Hello Everyone,
I guess I spilled the beans prematurely yesterday when I showed you my quilting room reorganization. I not only reorganized my room, I moved it up to our cabin in the Central Sierra Nevada mountains.
A few short weeks ago, our middle son's wife, decided she no longer wants to be married. Just like that. This revelation caught the entire family completely off guard.....especially our son. In order to keep some continuity in our grandchildren's lives, and let our son get back on his feet emotionally and financially, we are letting the three of them move into our home in the suburbs, and we are moving to our beloved cabin in the woods. We are going to try this arrangement for one year to see how it goes.
Our soon to be ex-DIL has been part of our life for 20 years. Twenty Years! I guess you never really know someone and what they are capable of doing to hurt themselves, and family members. Huge mid-life crisis.....maybe.
It is so hard watching your child hurting so much. I told our son that he has absolutely no control over the situation. But, he can control how he reacts to it. As a family, we decided to take a page out of Michelle Obama's book. "When they go low, we go high". We are taking the high road. We aren't saying an unkind word, in fact we haven't said any words. Silence is an opinion. You can read into that whatever you want and you will most likely be right.
We are keeping our bedroom suite completely intact in our city home. We will be driving from the mountains to the city instead of the other way around, which we've been doing since 1999. I'll still be teaching at In Between Stitches in Livermore. I'll be planning my classes around Little League, soccer, and softball games, and cross country meets. I want to get the biggest bang for my buck when we come back to town to see all of the kids both big and small.
I have a full year scheduled for 2018 with guild lectures, workshops, quilt shows, and classes. Most of what I have signed contracts for, is all based out of the city house. Our son will get tired of seeing us. We don't have room at the cabin for my long-arm, so every time I finish a quilt, we'll be back in the city. Again, I'll plan my machine quilting around sporting activities and family gatherings.
I retired from my real job, my career as a Geographic Information Systems Analyst at Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in 2008, the same year I started my pattern company. I really haven't had time to make a permanent tushie imprint in the antique chairs on the front porch....until now. I will totally concentrate on designing and marketing my patterns while sitting in my green chair
Mr. Joe and I spent nine glorious days in a row at the cabin. We were cleaning out closets and the garage preparing to move in items from the city house. We toasted each day at dinner. Day one.....day two and so on. We managed to not kill each other in those nine days. I think we are going to make it!
The first order of business is buying a generator for the days of power outages. We are also having a new wood-burning stove installed. The highlight of the move is now, drumroll.......we can rake pine needles year round!
I'll be blogging more on a regular basis once we are all settled in by the end of the month. I think this is going to be a good transition for us, and I'm looking forward to sharing stories about our year in the woods. If this coming winter is as intense as last winter.....oh boy.....life is going to be interesting.
We are headed off this morning from the city house to set up my booth for the Quilt Show in Brentwood. I'm looking forward to meeting all of the quilters and get away from packing.
Let the circus begin!
Soon,
Lynn
Life sometimes takes some interesting and unexpected turns, that is for sure. Will be thinking of your family and hope this change works out well for all of you. Give extra hugs to your son and grandkids.
ReplyDeleteIt is good to hear of your family working together so well for the good of all. Prayers for comfort and wisdom with all the changes.
ReplyDeleteOh how sad for your son and his children. You are so right that we never really know what is inside someone sometimes. I wish you all every happiness in your new adventures of life. You have been given some lemons, and I hope you can make and enjoy refreshing lemonade for a long time to come!
ReplyDeleteWow! Life-changing situation for all concerned. How true that we must all deal with the dealt cards and that silence is always an option (lots of times it's the best option!). Keeping your family in my prayers.
ReplyDeletePS Your new quilting space looks FANTASTIC! :o)
ReplyDeleteSo happy you're taking the high road Lynn. With you and Joe's support, healing can begin.
ReplyDeleteTake Care!
Thank you for sharing the reason for your move. I hope that the coming year will bring healing and a new outlook for your son and grandchildren. I look forward to reading about life in the woods and mountains.
ReplyDeleteHow fortunate for your son and grandkids that you are able to help in such a gracious way. Your attitude will surely be a good influence on those hurting most. Making lemonade out of lemons, right? Blessings and prayers going your way.
ReplyDeleteI hope that many positives come out of this as possible, as you have graciously taken the path that leads to forgiveness. You may never really understand another persons motivations and actions, but eventually they will appreciate yours.
ReplyDeleteHello from Iowa..I'm so sorry to hear about your son's marriage collapsing out of the blue. That is so sad. Good luck in moving to your cabin in the woods too. I have a nephew living in Livermore and he works at the Lawrence Lab too. Do you know a quilter by the name of Marilyn Lee (facebook)She lost her husband recently and they had just moved to the north country in Minnesota. She is trying to decide if she should stay, I think their cabin is really remote. But it looks like a beautiful place to live. I look forward to hearing about your cabin the woods, enjoy those green chairs!! Thinking of you and your family..
ReplyDeleteI have always believed that things happen for a reason and always work out for the best. Enjoy your "new" home and sense of retirement.
ReplyDeleteAs my cousin said when he told me about his daughter's divorce, "it is what it is". He lives next to his daughter and he has always helped, but now it is more important. Here's a little story I read once: a lady had a sweater set she wanted to wear but she could not. She was in the town house, but the pullover was in the mountain house and the cardigan in the ocean front house! You look well organized to know where everything is! I love the picture of all the quilts on your house.
ReplyDeleteSounds like your son will have the children - good for him. You are good parents to do this. I was wondering why the move, but think how wonderful life will be in the woods with the peace and quiet. Take care
ReplyDeleteYou (and your husband) are an inspiration. Sending good wishes for this new stage of your life and that of your son.
ReplyDeleteWell, life certainly is good at throwing surprises!! I hope all goes well, and I'll put your son and grandkids in my prayers. I'm hoping the year in the woods will be a wonderful one for you both, even though the cause of it isn't a good one. Hope all went well at your quilt show too!! Hugs and Kisses to you my friend!!!!
ReplyDeleteLife sure can throw a curved ball. Your son is blessed to have parents who are willing to be there for him and his family. I don't think he will get tired of seeing you. He will probably enjoy a home cooked meal once in a while. Praying the transition will go well.
ReplyDeleteFinally catching up on some blog reading. I love that quote, when they go low, we go high! Good for you for being the support your son and grandchildren need, and love how you get to go to the mountains year round, with a lot of trips to the city, classes, and quilt shows in between! Sending hugs to all and positive thoughts...and won't Gail and you have fun doing your cutting and packaging and touring and sewing and laughing and giggling, and so on and so forth!
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